Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The Octopus Has No Head, Part 1

This "Octopus" series of posts was drawn from emails I wrote during the last two months, in the wake of what may have been a tornado.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Hi Everybody!

So, last Tuesday night I come home around 10:00 pm, and see yellow tape over the outer doors of my apartment building. I'm thinking, what the FUCK?! So I go over to my landlord, who lives two blocks away, and he tells me a tornado ripped the roof off the building. Turns out, it wasn't officially classified, but some kind of "freak storm" (as the local paper called it) did rip the roof off the building, including the ceiling of two apartments -- my apartment missed similar damage by feet.

My building has been classified as uninhabitable, and water and power are off. Estimates range from days to weeks until I can get back in. And I may not want to, because in the interim there has been some water damage to the cieling of my kitchen, which may mean work will need to be done inside my apartment.

Thanks for listening, and if anybody wants to get drunk with me, please get in touch.

Friday, August 28, 2009


I have been barred from my apartment for over a month now, except for moving stuff out. In this time there has been water damage to my kitchen ceiling, and there is a big hole where the ceiling of my bathroom closet used to be. Some estimates put it at two weeks until the building is declared habitable again, but I'm not going back.

I'm giving 30 days notice for the end of September, and will be using the time to move out and get the place in order. I may need someone to help me with a bed and a dresser, possibly just to move the items to the curb, possibly to move the items somewhere else (in which case a truck will be necessary). If you might be able help, please get in touch.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Days after my last email, I entered my apartment to find three bad areas of water damage on the cieling -- two big sagging ones in the living room, and one in the bedroom. Two of these had cracked, dripping water onto the floor, ruining some papers in the living room.

I'm dealing with real geniuses here.

I gave 30 days notice on 8/31, and the very next day there was suddenly a hurry for me to evacuate. No one wants to be responsible for damage to my stuff, you see, so apparently 30 days notice only applies for the landlord's convenience.

Whatever. I'm shooting for the move-out to take a week . . .

Never, ever rent from a guy who answers the phone "Yeah?"

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