Monday, September 28, 2009

2012 is Not a Rush Album

Some substantial claims in the 2012 circus:

The Mayans appear to have predicted a shift from one “World Age” to the next at this time. The end of the Mayan “Long Count” of thirteen baktuns, over 5,000 years, is December 21, 2012, which also concludes several larger cycles and seems linked to the Precession of the Equinoxes, from the Age of Pisces to the Age of Aquarius, and specifically the Winter Solstice Sun rising in the dark rift at the center of the Milky Way on the last day of the cycle.

The quote comes from a mind-jarring (and much recommended) book, which encompasses not only 2012, but ties together a kaleidescope of stuff "Metaphysical" and "New Age." Plus it's a memoir -- don't you want to read about a personal relationship with Quetzalcoatl?

If you have no idea what I'm talking about, try a search on "2012" and enter vast waters filled with stuff that's really, in the words of the blindered, "out there." Or try this, which is scarier than other 2012 doomsday books because it outlines what appear to be scientifically plausible mega-catastrophes.

So, a bit less poetically than Mr. Pinchbeck, the classical Mayans predicted the eclipse, which forms the cusps of some their calendar cycles, possibly including their longest one. The Fifth World is over (or, if you're a Hopi, it's just starting). And other celestial phenomena appear to be cycling as well, including the severity of solar storms.

But, as the Mayan prediction bandwagon has been jumped, opining on what they knew, wrote, meant, or "really meant" is up for grabs. There is fervent anticipation of destruction and/or renewal, and the return of the aliens who seeded us.

My favorite prediction involves chips coded 666, which the New World Order is going to offer to you for implantation. In case you don't know, anything coded 666 is EVIL. In this case it's the old Antichrist, trying to scrape up the world for The Second Coming.   You'll be his slave if you take the chip, which will be a real bummer for you.

If the universe is anything like Star Trek V (The Fifth World?), and I'm sure it is, there is something really important at the center of our galaxy. So why not ask what happens when the sun interposes?  If we're really lucky (or unlucky), the words will boom from the sky:  "Attention all planets of the Solar Federation, we have assumed control."

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